Bear
by The Jack of Spades
Summary: "Tell you what ... How about if I get to keep the bear, and you get all my problems?"


_Bear_  
by Kitt  
  
  
Disclaimer: Square owneth all from FF7, whilst I owneth nothing.

  
  
  
_"If you are lost in your way  
Deep in an awesome story  
Don't be in doubt and stray  
Cling to your lonesome folly..."_  
---hack//SIGN - "A Stray Child"   
  
  


"Professor, board meeting's in twenty minutes." 

"I know, I know. I'm all ready. I'll only be a few minutes in here." 

Professor Gast walked into the nursery on weary feet. Board meetings were becoming more and more emotionally draining as of late and he wasn't looking forward to the next one. To pass the next twenty minutes that would normally go by with much worrying, he would pay a certain experiment a little visit. 

He passed through the doorway and into a very large and very stale room, gray and white and normally filled with bustling nurses. All around the room were big windows, tinted so that they were only of use to those who were looking in. No one was looking in now, however, as it was a little after twelve-thirty and all the doctors and scientists on the floor were out to lunch. 

The professor himself was too nervous to eat. The thought of doing so actually turned his stomach. He never knew what to expect from board meetings, so he could never relax before them, not long enough to build up an appetite. 

He trudged over to a caged area in the center of the great room, a square of floor surrounded by white bars that resembled a miniature prison. The professor leaned over the pen and folded his arms on the rail, looking down at what was inside: ShinRa's most prized piece of property, two-year-old Sephiroth, unusually quiet and white-haired, sitting in the middle of the pen and clutching a stuffed bear. He was perfectly still, like a statue. To one who had never seen anything sit so motionless before, it would've looked like a scene out of a dream. 

But the good-natured professor was used to it. "That a new one?" he asked, pointing to the toy. His voice echoed throughout the great room. 

The toddler in the pen stirred. He raised his head and beheld the man looking down at him. Recognition flashed in two large green eyes, tilted upward at the corners. He released the toy he was holding and crawled over to the rail closest to the professor, smiling. 

"Happy to see me, aren't you?" Gast said. His face reflected the baby's smile. "Not too many people bother to pay you a visit, do they? Unless it's time for another injection, right?" There the man's smile turned a little sour. "I know someone else who should be visiting you, but I can never seem to get him to do that..." 

The boy's father. Ever since the man's wife had died, he wanted little to do with his offspring. Granted, he had been the first person to hold the baby, but once he was handed over to Gast and his subordinates that was it. Perhaps he was trying to avoid unnecessary emotional attachments to a person who had been born primarily to become a killing machine. 

Gast could have mentioned Sephiroth's father, brought him up either by name or just by role, but that might've been telling the toddler too much. Never mind the fact that he was only two; he'd begun talking only three months after he'd been born. That fact pointed to a high intelligence quotient, although tests couldn't be done until he was much older. Who knew what mentioning things like his parents could bring about? 

The professor grimaced; he was getting too tired to stand. He turned and crossed the room, picked up one of the chairs against the wall, and brought it to the side of the pen. He sat down with a long sigh born of more weariness than he cared to contemplate. He turned his attention back to Sephiroth, who peered at him through the bars of his pen curiously. 

Gast smiled sadly. "You still look like a Jack to me." 

Sephiroth cocked his little head to one side, but said nothing. 

"That's what I was going to name you," the professor clarified, shifting in his seat, sitting up straighter. "I was going to name you Jack. I thought that'd be---" 

The baby pulled back from the rail and stuck out his tongue. "Thbbt!" 

Gast feigned a pained look. "You don't like that name? I thought it suited you. It's a nice name..." 

"Thbbt!" 

The professor chuckled a little. "Well... How about this one then---how about Eric? I had that in mind too..." 

Sephiroth made a very unpleasant face. 

"Ha, you remind me of the committee," said Gast. His eyes were rueful. "They didn't like my suggestions either. They wanted to give you a big fancy name, and you certainly got one." He paused there. "They were going to name you Zeus, you know." He spoke that matter-of-factly, looking directly at the baby. "I guess they figured it'd be nice to name you after a deity, since you're going to grow up to be really strong..." If all went well. 

Little Sephiroth shrugged, then turned and crawled further away from the professor, toward the other side of his pen. He pulled a white blanket up and over his head so that he looked like he was wearing a hood. He smiled again. 

Gast smiled too, and shook his head. "I'll be damn---darned, I'll be darned if you don't have her eyes. Not so much the shape, but the color..." 

Sephiroth blinked once, then twice. 

"Oh, don't mind me. I'm just musing. I thought I could get away with doing that around you, since you're so young..." 

The baby shook his head wildly, back and forth. 

Gast's eyes widened. "Oh, you won't let me, will you? You're too smart." 

Now the baby nodded. 

"I thought so," said the professor. He watched Sephiroth reach for the stuffed bear and drag it closer to him. "Uh-oh, I think we tattooed the wrong hand," he noted with a touch of dismay. "You're using your left hand a lot... Tell you what," he started, a smile creeping into his voice. "We'll tattoo the left one too, give you a set of matching tattoos. How d'ya like that? One on each hand?" 

Sephiroth peered over the stuffed bear, his eyes wide like saucers. He looked angry. He pushed his toy aside and covered the back of his right hand with his left. "It's _ugly_," he stated, pouting. 

That wiped the smile off Gast's face. "I'm only teasing," he said apologetically. 

The boy's harsh expression softened. He reached for his bear again and cradled it against his chest, the blanket still draped over his head. "Bear," he said happily, burying his face into the soft toy. 

"Is that his name?" Gast asked. 

Sephiroth raised his head, beheld the good professor for a moment or so, and then shrugged again. 

Gast leered a bit, growing thoughtful the more he stared at the boy. A few moments passed and he said nothing, just watching and thinking. Then at last he said, "I wish they had let me take you in. You know that? I could've been your foster-father. I think things would've been easier for you that way. They don't give you much attention here. I know even I can't be here that often; I have so much to do... But if they don't pay attention to you enough, you won't grow up right. You'll be too withdrawn. It's important for babies to get enough affection." 

Sephiroth looked confused. "Bear," he repeated. 

"Ah, you didn't understand _that_, did you?" Gast asked. "But just hear me out anyway; I don't get to talk about this much to anyone else. You don't have a choice; you can't run away from me!" He laughed there. 

Sephiroth laughed with him. It was a pleasant sound actually, one that drew the attention of a lone nurse who was outside, in the hallway. Sephiroth, the silent baby, the one that never cried or laughed. He was always so sullen. 

She entered the room, half-smiling. "Professor," she started, sounding amazed. "Is he _laughing_?" 

Gast faced the nurse. "Yes, he is." 

"I've been trying to get him to do that for months now," she said, frowning. "He must like you better." 

"Mmm." Gast merely leered, turning back to face the boy. "You fed him already, correct?" 

"Yes, at noon on the dot," the nurse reported proudly. 

"Good." 

Meanwhile, Sephiroth was trying to regain everyone's attention. He pulled the blanket over his head completely, then peeked out shyly, smiling, right in time to see the nurse coming to the side of his pen. 

"He needs more attention," Gast observed, chin in hand. "Look, he's putting on a show here. I don't think he's getting a healthy amount---" 

"I give him as much as I can," the nurse countered. "It's just so busy around here that I---" 

"Uwaaaaaaa!" 

The nurse jumped a little. Sephiroth had thrown off the blanket and surprised her. And then laughed at her shock. 

Gast laughed. "See? He's not particular. If you laugh around him, you'll give him reason to do the same." 

The baby buried himself back under his blanket. 

The nurse turned to Professor Gast. "When's his next injection?" 

The professor looked at his wristwatch. "In another...hour and a half, just about. At two o'clock. Listen, if the meeting runs a little late, can you handle it yourself? You know what to do, right?" 

The nurse nodded. "I'll be back then. I've got to---" 

"Uwaaaaaaa!" Sephiroth tossed the blanket off and startled everyone again. The nurse shushed him and his smile fell into a frown. He pulled the blanket over his head again and kept quiet. 

"I've got to leave now," the nurse continued. "I hope the meeting goes well for you." She turned and headed out of the nursery. 

Gast merely nodded in reply. The door to the room opened, then closed. Things became relatively still again. 

Sephiroth pulled the blanket off his head and looked around. "She left?" 

"Mmm," said the professor. He was slumped over on the chair now. "I really wish she wouldn't have reminded me of that damn meeting. I'm not looking forward to it at all---" 

"Don't go," said Sephiroth knowledgeably, albeit as knowledgeable as a two-year-old could sound. He crawled back to the professor, got to his feet, and looked up at him. 

Gast chuckled, but it was a remorseful sound. "I wish it were that easy, son." He turned away from the baby and his eyes grew distant. He knew what to expect during the upcoming meeting. A hot topic at ShinRa lately had been the idea of creating Jenova-infused super creatures the quick way. That method involved, among other things, high exposure to Mako radiation, and tests on lesser animals have shown that the side effects could often be fatally debilitating. It was inhumane, and Gast seemed to be alone in opposing the idea. 

Sephiroth saw how sad the professor looked and came up with a little solution. He grabbed his stuffed toy and held it out over the rail. "Here," he said simply. 

Professor Gast raised his head a bit. "You're giving it to me?" 

The baby nodded. 

The professor took the stuffed bear and set it down on his lap. He studied it impassively for a time, before his face broke into a handsome smile. "That's...very thoughtful of you..." 

"No keeping." 

"Oh, I see... It's on loan. Well, thank you anyway. Very nice of you." He stroked the bear's fur. His smile dissipated into a deep frown. 

"Happy?" questioned the baby in the pen. 

Gast shook his head. "No... Well, a little happier than I would've been..." 

"Why not a lot?" 

The professor sighed. "Well...grownup problems are really big, complicated things," he explained. "It takes a lot to make them go away." 

Now it was the baby's turn to frown. 

Gast's eyes grew distant, his thoughts straying, his fingers still stroking the stuffed animal. If only he could talk to someone who really understood. If only he could get rid of all his burdens. "Tell you what," he said suddenly. "How about if I get to keep the bear, and you get all my problems? We'll trade." He turned back to the baby, who immediately reached over the rails of the pen, wanting his toy back. "Oh, hey, hey, I wasn't being serious! All right, here." 

The professor handed the bear back to Sephiroth, who took it and toddled back to the center of the pen. He sat down and clutched his toy protectively, growing eerily still again. 

"You're lucky; you're so young," Gast started, watching him, but he eventually abandoned the thought. What good was youth to this boy? His life had already been decided, even before he was born. Youth was normally a time for one to make their own decisions, to set one's own course. No, Sephiroth wasn't lucky to be young. Luck for him might've meant no life at all, just death. 

The professor felt melancholic. He stole a glance at his wristwatch again; its face read ten of one. Very well, he would leave now and make his way to the conference room. He left his chair and made for the doorway. When he got there, he turned around, giving the baby one final look. 

Sephiroth was staring back at him. It was funny; from that distance he looked normal, as any other two-year-old would look. One wouldn't think he was so special or that he meant so much. Just an ordinary baby, holding a stuffed toy. Not at all like a product of genetic manipulation... 

...Which could very well become the fate of other babies like him, if someone didn't stand up for them. Yes, someone had to be the spokesperson for the little people who didn't have voices yet. And someone had to speak up for the ordinary soldiers in ShinRa's army, those guinea pigs in waiting. They were little too, insomuch that they had just as little an effect on the way things went around here as a mere baby did. 

Who would speak for them? Or rather, who had been speaking for them this whole time, and who should continue to do so, even in the face of opposition? 

That suddenly, Professor Gast found the strength he needed for the meeting. He turned and left the nursery, determined as ever. 


End file.
